Regarding Certain Recent Events Involving the Television.

Mom's view:


First of all, let me just say that I have loved television for as long as I can remember. I learned to read from Sesame Street, ran home for the Happy Days/Laverne and Shirley dynamic duo in the afternoon, and grew up with the Cosby kids. In times of crisis, like 9/11, I have turned to television as a comfort and a guide. I become inexplicably happy during the 5th or 6th hour of a reality T.V. marathon, wallowing unshowered and clad in my pajamas, holding my seventh bowl of cereal in my hands. I can’t imagine my life without it.

That being said, I have discontinued my cable service, including even the local channels.

My customer service representative clearly thought I was insane. “You want to downgrade to the basic package?”
“What’s the basic package?”
“Local channels and a few others.”
“Will I be able to watch television with that package?”
“Yes.”
“I don’t want the basic package.”

It seemed inordinately hard to convince her that the full disconnect was the best option for me. When I told ____ the night after I called the cable company, he wasn’t happy with me either.
“But I’m staying organized.”
“I know. It’s not about that.”
“Then why?”
“Because we need to change the habit.”
He was strangely quiet after that.

The simple truth is that I disconnected service to all the televisions because of what happened one recent evening. It is actually embarrassing, as a parent, to write. But if I don’t confess to these transgressions, who will?

On this fateful evening, the television was on when I got home, but the homework wasn’t done. I asked _______if he had homework and he said, “just a little, and it’s really easy.” I asked him to turn off the television and do his homework when he finished his dinner. Dinner, for both of us, was in front of separate televisions (unfortunately, a really common occurrence). I was caught up in the double Grey’s Anatomy rerun on Lifetime, despite the fact that I’ve seen them all before. When the second one finished, I noticed the television was still on in the other room.
“I thought you were going to turn off the T.V. and do your homework?”
“I finished it.”
“In front of the T.V.?”
“Mom, it was really easy.”

An hour later I was deeply enmeshed in another show. One so compelling that I don’t remember what it was as I write this. ________ walked in.
“Remember how I was having trouble counting to forty in French before? I’m really good at it now. Un, deux, trois…”
“Honey, can we do this in a little bit? This is right at the good part.”

I actually said that! Out loud!

The next morning, I reviewed the really easy homework done in front of the television. It was a paragraph about a book he’d written. True to form, it was really well written and interesting. BUT HE SPELLED THE NAME GEORGE WRONG. And that was even part of the book’s title. He kept talking about "Gorge" all the way through the whole thing. Tell me that doesn’t have something to do with the television blaring in the background while he was writing it. Actually, if you did I wouldn’t believe you. And what parent would rather sit in front of Grey’s Anatomy reruns rather than eat dinner with her child? Or tells them to bug off with their fancy French speaking until the commercial? Something needed to be done.

I’m educated, keep my house relatively clean, know what my son is doing at almost every given moment, care deeply about him and his studies, monitor his assignments and ensure he’s done his homework, talk to him about his day every day, and basically otherwise perform as a normal mother. I read extensively, and I truly don’t spend every single waking moment in front of the television. But after nights like the one described above, where I fall in and don’t emerge from the haze until bedtime, I really feel like I'm one wifebeater away from a pretty lowbrow existence. And I’m starting to see the same pattern in my son.

So I have disconnected the cable. As I write this, it hasn’t happened yet, and I spend approximately 7 seconds every hour trying to convince myself that having the basic channels would be okay. Which is just, in my opinion, more proof that it needs to be done. We are stuck in a rut, and we both need enough time to develop a new pattern. Hopefully, it will be one in which the television is an afterthought, rather than the first thought.

We’ll see. This may be an appropriate topic for some “State of the State” addresses in the future, as our days loom long without mindless entertainment.

Son's view:
I think that not having the T.V. is the stupidest idea in the world. I can’t watch my sports shows. My mom can’t watch her shows. I think my mom made a mistake. I mean I will not have T.V. and she won’t have T.V. either so it’s like she’s grounding herself. Honestly I think that’s she’s going to want the T.V. on more than I want it on.

Mom's view of son's view:

He may be right.